The School Bus

I have to apologize for last Friday... can you believe that I completely forgot? What a crazy week we had! And as school gets closer to ending, it seems like things get busier and busier.

Today's post is a guest post from a friend (who actually came up with the name for my blog - so props to my friend for an awesome name!!). I am grateful to her for being willing to share this recent experience she had on the blog. Food allergies are often misunderstood and the only way to combat that is to get more information out there. My friend's story is an eye-opener to the ignorance that is out there and what we, as parents of food allergic children, have to deal with on a daily basis.

I've been thinking about this a lot lately...for the past 6 years to be exact. That's when my daughter Kendall was diagnosed with severe, life-threatening allergies to peanuts and eggs. I am the mother of a child with food allergies. I KNOW I am perceived by others as a "high-maintenance" mother – a "helicopter" mother by some. But not a day goes by that I do not wonder if my child with food allergies will come in contact with a food allergen that will cause her to stop breathing and go into anaphylactic shock. I know how to handle the situation but will her teacher, the school workers, the lunch room attendants, the bus driver????

I wasn't going to share this story publicly, and I don’t know if many people will actually take the time to read this whole thing.   But I wanted to write this because I am bothered by the ignorance of some who just do NOT understand that one small crumb or cross-contamination of a food allergen can literally cause my child to stop breathing. I know most people will just scroll past this post because who has time to deal with food allergies when it doesn't involve them personally? I just hope that maybe I can encourage just ONE more person to understand what I deal with on a daily basis. So here's my story:

Last week Kendall's bus driver handed out donuts to the students on his bus for good behavior during a bus evacuation drill. When Kendall came home and told me about the donuts (WHICH USUALLY CONTAIN EGGS AND COULD CONTAIN PEANUTS!--and YES, I explained the severity of Kendall's allergies to the bus driver at the beginning of the school year!) I went through the usual conversation of "I'm sorry you couldn't eat one. Next time I'll get you a peanut and egg free treat that you can have instead." What she said next was a big eye opener: "BUT MOM, I don't care about the treat! They ate the donuts on the bus and I was worried about getting hives the WHOLE way to school!" She's 7 years old.

I thought about this situation for a while before I called the bus depot to talk to the supervisor. At the beginning of the school year I was told I could not allow Kendall to carry an Epi-Pen in her backpack in case another child accidentally played with it and got hurt. SO I bought my 5th grader a cell phone and put him in charge of being the "peanut police" and he was to call me if Kendall had any problems on the bus. The drive from the bus stop to the school is short and I have not worried about it too much because there are enough kids on the bus who know Kendall well and know what to watch for with her. I’m also usually very close by so I know that I could get to her within the few short minutes I would need to save her life. There are also 2 other children on the same bus with peanut and egg allergies as well. As my son, the "peanut police" was enjoying not ONE but TWO donuts...my daughter was terrified of getting cross-contaminated. I do not blame my son. He's 11. He loves donuts. I blame an ignorant bus driver who does not understand the severity of a child with food allergies.

Like I said...many of you will scroll right past this LONG post but if you've made it this far keep reading. The story gets better. A few days after this incident the bus depot supervisor advised our bus driver he could not hand out treats anymore. Now I'm the "MEAN" mom. I'm sure I offended the bus driver. He probably spent a fortune on all of the donuts for all of the students.  And I'm sure the students who could actually enjoy them were very excited to get such a wonderful treat to start their school day with (don't even get me started on that!). And for the record, I have heard that you're a mean bus driver if you don't hand out as many treats as the other bus drivers. As if bus drivers should use their hard earned money to buy our kids treats every week?!???!

I had mainly called to talk to the supervisor to find out if I could keep an Epi-Pen in my daughter's backpack, not to ask them to get rid of treats on the bus. The supervisor made the executive decision to just tell the bus driver "No treats!" I even told the supervisor that I was ok if the bus driver hands out treats as the kids exit the bus because I know I cannot control every single thing my daughter comes in contact with. (BUT I CAN TRY MY HARDEST!) I was just asking that he please not hand them out ON THE BUS! I was told that I was the FIRST mother to make this request! In an entire SCHOOL DISTRICT with several cities...I'M THE FIRST MOTHER TO ASK THAT PEANUT CONTAMINATED FOOD NOT BE HANDED OUT TO THE KIDS ON THE BUS????? WHAT?!?!?! Back to the story, the supervisor was very supportive in my request to have her carry an Epi-Pen on the bus. BUT...I have to call the school district, talk to the school nurse (again) contact the principal...etc. It's not going to be easy. And I STILL might be told NO!

The story continues... a few days after this incident my 11 year old was telling us how funny it was that the bus driver told them he was going to bring a bunch of cats on the bus. He said into his loudspeaker "Oh wait! How many kids are allergic to cats???" Several students raised their hand. He continued, "Well, I guess I can't bring cats on the bus then because you guys are allergic to them." My kids did not know his intention here but I KNEW what his intention was! HE WAS MOCKING ME! Really, Mr. Bus Driver???? Just goes to show people really do NOT understand the severity of food allergies! Our bus driver still DOES NOT GET IT!!!!!  And yes, I know I could just drive my daughter to school, which I do quite often, but that is not the point. The point is that I have to live every minute of every day just HOPING that all of the "responsible" adults who take care of my daughter take her LIFE-THREATENING FOOD ALLERGIES seriously! Kids with food allergies are becoming more and more common, yet so many adults refuse to acknowledge this! They think we CHOOSE to eliminate eggs, dairy, peanuts, and other dangerous food allergens from our children's diet. Do you think I ENJOY squinting at tiny food labels in the grocery store on every item I buy to make sure I do not accidentally contaminate my daughter?

So...I will contain to be a high maintenance mother. I will continue to complain to the school district if my daughter is placed in a life-threatening situation. If a child had a gun on the bus do you think the bus driver would laugh and make cat jokes about it? I didn't think so. Thank you if you took time to read this EXTREMELY long post. I'm just trying to make other people aware. I will worry and protect my daughter with food allergies her entire life. That's what mother's do. That's what I do - every day. 

Thanks to my friend Jenny for sharing her story. My hope is that we can help increase awareness one story at a time and make the world a safer place for kids (and adults) with food allergies.

Jana

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Overwhelmed

I guess it is pretty obvious that I haven't posted in a long time - a really long time. To be quite honest, I became so overwhelmed with life and everything that comes with life. Ok, a lot of it boils down to taking away The Princess's binky and her deciding to stop napping. She went from a very happy, fun-loving toddler to a very mean, ornery, stubborn (ok, she was that way before) and demanding toddler. I just couldn't keep up with everything (and still find the time to blog) and something had to give. So, I backed away from blogging for a bit until the dust settled.

We are now about 6 weeks post-binky and still haven't quite figured things out completely. We kind of have a system down now where The Princess gets to spend an hour (at least we try for that, but inevitably, she ends up banging on her door around 30 to 45 minutes in) in her room for "quiet time". Whether she takes a nap or not is her decision (and so far her decision is to not take a nap - ever! Until we get in the car and than she is out).  That "quiet time" gives me a few minutes to get things done. Anyway... there really is something called the terrible 2's! To make matters more fun, we are also in the middle of potty-training.

The Princess weathering the storms of life... with a spiderman umbrella, of course!

Switching gears a bit from the joys of having a toddler to the second reason I was feeling overwhelmed. If you have followed my blog since the beginning, you know that The Princess was diagnosed with an egg (and milk) allergy along with her allergies to peanuts and brazil nuts right before she turned 1.  We had her tested for additional allergies (and retested for her known allergies) when she turned 2. We learned that she had already outgrown the egg and milk allergies (and thankfully had not developed any new allergies). That knowledge obviously changed the way we had been cooking - since we were cooking without eggs. As the time went on, we were able to slowly work eggs into The Princess's diet, until now she can tolerate scrambled eggs - and actually really likes them.

One of the main reasons I started this blog was to share recipes that I had either created or adapted to suit The Princess's allergies - one of the main ones being her egg allergy.  Once she outgrew her egg allergy, I still felt a sense of responsibility to continue to post "egg-less" recipes, yet we weren't eating that way at home. Most of the recipes I was making for my family, I felt I couldn't put on the blog because they contained eggs. As more time went on, I found that there were fewer and fewer recipes I felt were "blog-worthy". I found myself spending more and more time trying to create or adjust recipes just for the blog and less and less time with my kids.

In my month off of blogging, I have been wondering if I would/could keep the blog going and what type of recipes I would post if I did keep blogging.  I found myself thinking at times, "This would be a good recipe to post" and at other times enjoying not having to take pictures of everything I cooked. As of today,  I guess you could say I have decided to keep posting recipes. There is no guarantee they will be regular - that depends on The Princess and The Brother's sports schedules - and whether I have found time to cook some new and wonderful things.

As for what types of recipes?  I will post what we eat. So, to those who need egg-less recipes, I will post a tutorial in the near future on how to replace eggs in recipes so that you can easily change recipes yourself. Of course, all the recipes I post will be peanut (and brazil nut) free (and will have options if you need to avoid tree nuts - where possible). Since we have also been focusing on "clean-eating" in our house in the last year, that is the direction my blog will also take. I know that many may not share my views on the need to get rid of processed foods, additives, preservatives, artificial sweeteners and food colorings, but I hope I can share with you my passion on why I feel it is so important for our family... and for every family.

I will continue to share tips, tricks and information on navigating life with food allergies. And for those who are parenting children with food allergies or intolerances, I will share insights into the life of The Princess and the life of a mother of a child with food allergies. Since, lets face it, motherhood is hard enough and adding in the stress, anxiety and extra things a food allergy mother deals with makes it even harder.

I hope that you will still find recipes that work for you and your family and that you enjoy as much as we do. Thanks for taking the time to read my blog and put up with my crazy life!

Jana

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It could be worse...

There are times as I sit thinking about The Princess, her allergies, the difficulties of getting people to be tolerant and accepting of food allergies, and what lies ahead in her life, I have a little pity party for what she has to deal with and what I have to deal with. It is hard to have a child with food allergies and know that they will experience some pain in life.

Than I remember that she is strong and healthy. Despite not being able to eat peanuts and brazil nuts, she has no other medical conditions. I realize that I should be grateful that this trial is very small compared to some... and it could be much worse.

I have recently learned about a young boy named Mitchell who has it much worse.  Check out the Facebook page his father created that follows his journey with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy - a disease that is rapidly destroying his heart. Scrolling through the many posts and pictures has changed my views... there is no room in my life for a pity party.

Jana

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The Talk

We are going to begin this post with a story... which we haven't done yet on the blog. There is a first time for everything.

One morning, I was getting after Brother #1 for not cleaning out his lunch box the night before and leaving it on the floor in his backpack. He had taken a PB sandwich to school for lunch the day before and the remnants were still in his lunch container. I reminded him what could happen if The Princess was to get her hands on it.  After this conversation with Brother #1, Brother #2 decides he is going to teach The Princess a thing or two about her food allergies. (I have already started talking to The Princess about peanuts and peanut butter and how they can make her sick -- even though she is not even 2 1/2 yet, but that is as far as we have taken it.) This is the conversation:

Brother #2: "Princess, if you eat peanuts, you will not just get sick, you will DIE. Do you know what that means, DIE!!" (emphasis on the word die, said with a low, raspy and dramatic voice).

The Princess: "You eat peanuts, you will die. You eat peanuts, you will die" (This was repeated many times over the course of the day.)

That conversation reminded me of the seriousness of The Princess's allergies. Not that I had forgotten, but sometimes I think I get too complacent. It is always good to have simple reminders when dealing with the life of my daughter - simple reminders that aren't life threatening.  It also had me thinking of the appropriate time to teach food allergic children the seriousness of their allergies.

As mentioned earlier, we have already begun telling The Princess that she can't eat peanuts or peanut butter because it will make her sick but I'm pretty sure she doesn't understand. She usually asks for peanut butter after we talk to her about it because it is on her mind. I wonder at what point will she understand. At what point will she be old enough to understand what could happen if she ate peanuts or peanut butter. I asked that question to some friends who also have kids with food allergies. One of them said it took a trip to the ER for her son to figure out the severity of his allergies. Yikes! Luckily he was ok.

I want The Princess to be safe and have the knowledge she needs to make her own decisions as she gets older, but I don't want her to have anxiety and be paranoid to eat food in general. There is a very fine line that parents of food allergic children and food allergic people themselves have to walk. Enough paranoia and anxiety to keep your child (or yourself) safe but not so much that you can't function when eating outside your own home.

The Princess is a very care-free child and not one to worry too much about things. I would like to keep her that way and wonder how I will teach her about her allergies without filling her full of fear. So far, I have let her be babysat by a few individuals (who have either been trained or have kids with food allergies) - which sounds harmless, but is in fact, a very scary thing. I have also allowed The Princess to attend church class with other little kids her age - even though there is food served (which I have screened, of course) and the remote possibility that someone could have brought peanuts or peanut containing products into their classroom during the week and there could be residue or crumbs left behind. Hopefully these small steps allow her freedom and room to grow and become independent.

My hope for The Princess is that she will feel like a normal child who just happens to have food allergies and not a child whose entire life is consumed and dictated by food allergies.

Jana

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My Food Philosophy in a Nutshell

I thought that this post had posted last Tuesday... but I'm not sure that it did. I can see page views, but it it doesn't show up on the blog. Weird!! I was using the internet at a hotel that obviously wasn't reliable. Hence.... there may (or may not) have been a post on Tuesday and there was no post on Friday. I might have forgotten to post on Friday, but even if I hadn't forgotten it probably wouldn't have posted anyway. So, my apologies for dropping the ball and going on vacation again where there was only unreliable internet. Now I am paying the price big time for that vacation... a super dirty house, tired, ornery kids and no energy due to eating junk food for a week. But anyway... back to the post. 

Every person has some kind of food philosophy... something that guides the food choices they make. Some food philosophies are based on convenience and ease, some are based on taste and pleasure, some are based on nutrition and health and obviously many are a combination. And, of course, some food philosophies are dictated by food allergies.

We develop our food philosophies from our parents and even grandparents and other family (things we learned growing up), from roommates, spouses and friends. Our philosophies can also be influenced by what we hear and read, research we have done and our current situation in life.

I am going to lay out my food philosophy in this post  (so stop reading if that doesn't interest you), not because I think you need to adopt it, but to explain why I choose to make what I do and where I am coming from when I create/recreate recipes and choose ingredients.

I feel like I have always eaten a 'healthy' diet and therefore my family ate a 'healthy' diet (because I am the family chef). But the definition of a 'healthy' diet is so arbitrary. So, when someone says they eat healthy, what does that really mean? I asked a bunch of people (on Facebook - very scientific, I know) what their definition of healthy eating is and everyone's answer was a little bit different. So instead of just telling you that we eat "healthy", I will lay out my definition of healthy.

I have chosen to take a "real" food approach to eating. It hasn't always been the case, but in the last year we have made some changes in our diet and it revolves around whole food (or "real" food). For those who might be confused when I use the term "real" food (because what else would we eat, right?), here is a definition:

REAL FOOD is defined as…

• Whole foods that typically only have 1-ingredient like “brown rice” or no ingredient label at all like fruits and vegetables!
• Packaged foods generally made with no more than 5 unrefined ingredients.
• Dairy products like whole milk, unsweetened yogurt, eggs, and cheese (organic).
• Breads and crackers that are 100% whole-grain.
• Wild caught seafood.
• Locally and humanely raised meat like chicken, pork, beef, and lamb.
• Dried fruits, nuts, and seeds.
• Naturally made sweeteners including honey and maple syrup.
• Foods that are more a product of nature “than a product of industry”*

REAL FOOD is not…

• Labeled as “low fat” or “low carb” or “low calorie” (in most cases).
• Made with refined or artificial sweeteners like sugar or aspartame.
• Deep fried in refined oils like canola oil.
• 100-calorie packs or any foods made from refined grains like white flour, which is
  often labeled as “wheat flour” without the word “whole” in front of it.
• In packages with loads of ingredients, some of which you cannot pronounce or would not cook with in your own kitchen.
• Highly processed foods that are labeled as organic (like organic cheddar crackers, organic cookies, or organic candy).
• From a drive through window or gas station.

*Source: In Defense of Food by Michael Pollan

Now, just as a disclaimer, this is what we strive for. It can cost more to eat this way and as of now, we pick and choose certain things to stay in our budget. We currently don't do organic dairy or all organic fruits and vegetables... only what I can find that fits in our budget.

I prefer to make things from scratch with ingredients I can buy and read/pronounce. Now, before you freak out, we do NOT eat perfectly all the time. I do have 3 kids who can by picky at times. We do our best and don't feel guilty when we aren't perfect. Yes, my kids eat fast food on occasion (but only seldom on occasion, not "once a week" on occasion). I try to have fruits and vegetables and other healthy snacks always available (raw nuts and seeds, homemade muffins, granola bars, popsicles, etc...) but sometimes we do crackers, bagel and other convenience items. But, when it comes to cooking in my house and what recipes and ingredients I choose, I have a few guidelines that I follow:

1. Some of you may have noticed that I (almost) never use all-purpose (or white) flour. We have chosen to do only whole grains (whole-wheat, spelt, kamut, wonder flour... those kind of whole grains). Does this mean my recipes can't be made with all-purpose flour? Of course not - sub away if you like.

2. When possible, I choose to use raw sugars (like turbinado sugar, raw sugar and sucanat) and sweeten with natural sweeteners (like honey and maple syrup). This isn't in everyone's budget (sometimes it isn't in our budget). No worries though, sugar is sugar and it is best to eat it sparingly in any form (natural or processed). To minimize our sugar intake, we also choose to buy the "plain" version of many things and sweeten them ourselves.

3. I have chosen to use only coconut oil, real butter (never margarine), olive oil, flax seed oil and sometimes grapeseed oil. I realize others have their opinions on coconut oil, canola oil and other oils (and what is healthy and what is not).  Choose what is best for your family and situation. 

4. We eat a lot of whole fruits and vegetables... namely leafy greens. We try and have a salad every night for dinner and (are still working on) green smoothies every day.

5. We eat (or try very hard to eat) "dessert" once per week. You can read about my reasons for this here.

So, are you wondering why I am even posting this? Well, first because I want you (my reader) to realize why I choose the recipes (and ingredients) I do. Please feel free to make adjustments according to your food philosophy. And don't feel guilty if your philosophy is different from mine (or your neighbors, or best friend or the lady at the gym etc...). Just make sure that your philosophy is working for your family in providing the healthiest food and lifestyle possible.

Also, I have noticed that The Princess seems to be very sensitive to food (especially preservatives, additives and food colorings that are added to processed foods), lotions, soaps, laundry detergent and many other things (as I believe many people with food allergies are).  As the person who is most involved in the care of The Princess (along with her daddy), it is my responsibility to make sure she is as safe and healthy as possible. I feel this is best done by feeding her the most healthy, highest quality "real" food that we can afford (with minimal preservatives, additives and artificial and processed ingredients). This not only keeps her safe, but gives her (and The Brothers) the best chance of a healthy future!

Jana

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Favorites in the Kitchen

We all have those things in the kitchen, whether big or small appliances or just things that making cooking easier, that we can't live without. I decided that I needed to share some of my favorite items in the kitchen. I should have done this before Christmas, but I am a little behind. Now you have all year before Christmas to make your list of things you want to add to your kitchen (or you can ask for them for your birthday or mother's/father's day) 

Blendtec Total Blender
This blender is definitely an investment... but it is worth every penny! I use this thing EVERY day, often a couple times a day. It is excellent for making smoothies, homemade nut butters, waffle and pancake batters, soups and everything in between. I crack grains for hot cereals and mill grains for flour (my favorite is fresh cornmeal from popping corn) when I only need a small amount. I have only had mine for about 10 months, but I don't think I could live without it now.

Nutrimill Grain Mill
A grain mill is another investment piece for your kitchen that is worth the money. A grain mill is essential for healthy, whole foods (or clean) eating. I mill my own wonder flour, spelt flour, kamut flour and whole wheat flour. It is so much cheaper to buy the grains in bulk and make your own flour than to buy them pre-milled. Whole grain flours also lose nutrients after they have been milled if not properly stored. I know how old all my flour is and how it has been stored. Biting into something made with rancid flour is not a pleasant thing... trust me. I know this from experience.

Norpro Silicone Molds
These are the BEST! We love to make our own gogurts and "smoothie pops" to eat for breakfast or snacks. Kids love the taste of gogurts and moms love the portability, but gogurts have more sugar in them than ice cream. Not what we want in a so-called "healthy" food. I love to take plain yogurt (I use greek) and mix in some fruit and honey, give it a whirl in the blender and stick it in these molds. They can be eaten right away or frozen and added to school lunches. My kids actually like to eat them frozen and not thawed. I also like to make green smoothies and put them in these molds and freeze them. The Princess will pretty much eat anything I put in these molds. These come in sets of 4 and are BPA-free. I have 2 sets (because I love them so much) and bought mine at Amazon.

Pampered Chef Measure All
This is the best measuring cup for hard to scoop items like coconut oil, nut butters or thick molasses. You simply pull down the inside part, fill the "cup" full of whatever you are measuring and than push it out. All you have to do is scrape off the flat surface to get everything, no more scraping out measuring cups. I have the one cup size.

Silpat
My fabulous cousin gave this to me for my birthday 2 years ago - I had never heard of it before. It is simply awesome. No more non-stick spray when making cookies. Simply lay the silpat onto your cookie sheet and nothing sticks. It is easy to clean and store and (when taken care of properly) can last for years! You can find these on Amazon.

Ziploc divided containers (Rectangle)
We love these for school lunches. No more plastic bags to throw away each day. With divided compartments, I can fill each one with something different and they don't have to touch (obviously liquids can't go in here).  They are BPA-free, very sturdy and come in a 2-pack. I bought mine at Amazon.

Apple Peeler/Slicer/Corer 
This was another birthday present (also from my fabulous cousin). I LOVE homemade apple pie, apple crisp and applesauce. This makes the worst part of those recipes (dealing with the apples) quick and easy. You can get the kind that suctions to the counter (what I have) or clips on the overhang (which I don't, the overhang part of the counter). These are fairly inexpensive, easy to store and well-worth having in your kitchen.

Air Popper
Air popped popcorn is super healthy for a snack anytime of the day. I like to make a trail-mix of sorts with air-popped popcorn, raw almonds and cereal (or homemade granola) for The Princess. It is also great for when you want to make some healthy kettle corn or caramel popcorn.

Jana

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Disneyland.. it is the Happiest Place on Earth - even with Food Allergies

We are Disney freaks... well, The Princess's Daddy and his family are. So, I guess I have inherited this love.  The Brothers and The Princess all first visited before the age of 2 - and this trip was actually The Princess's second visit. So, you can see that there might be a little fanaticism going on.

When we first decided to take The Princess, I was terrified. What would she eat? What might she come in contact with? Would we end up in the hospital there in California (which has actually happened to us the first year we took Brother #1. An untimely asthma attack landed us in the ER for a couple hours - luckily, it all turned out ok)? I had so many questions about how we would manage the trip with The Princess and her dietary restrictions. Now, after 2 trips under our belt, I can say that Disneyland (or any Disney theme park) is probably one of the BEST vacations you can do with a food allergic child.

First, we were allowed to bring our own food into the park (an entire cooler, actually). We have always done it, but now I know that if we were ever questioned it would be allowable.  This not only saves a TON of money (because yes, eating in the park can get very expensive) it allows us to bring in all kinds of food that is safe for The Princess. We brought in sandwiches made with homemade almond butter and nutella, crackers, fresh fruit, cheese sticks, homemade granola bars and a bunch of other stuff. We could eat at our leisure and not worry about finding safe food.

Even though it was cold, she loved the beach

Now, if you do like to eat in the park, it can be easily done with food allergies (although, if there are multiple food allergies it might get a little more difficult). The first time we took The Princess, her Granddad took it upon himself to ask every food vendor we passed about their food. I couldn't believe how much information the food vendors had about the ingredients in their food. It was very easy to pick which ones The Princess could and couldn't eat. I also honestly don't remember anything being contaminated with peanuts (except for the obvious things that actually contained peanuts). We never ate in a sit-down restaurant, but I have read that they do their best to accommodate food allergies. They simply prefer if you call in ahead of time and make requests in advance. 

In the rain with her aunt

We did frequent the IHOP restaurant across the street from the main entrance and they were extremely helpful. Before any food was ordered, we were asked (before we could even bring it up) whether anyone in the party had food allergies. With 3 kids who were sharing parts of their meal, they didn't even bat an eye when we asked them to redo part of an order because something The Princess was going to eat had come in contact with Brother #1's eggs (this happened before The Princess had her negative test to eggs). 

(on the Carousel - on of her favorite rides)

Disneyland is probably the cleanest amusement park I have ever been to. Although, the first time we visited with The Princess, I was worried about whether The Princess might come in contact with something by grabbing a wrapper left out or by simply touching a hand rail or another part of a ride, that never happened. It helps to wash hands often and try to get kids to not touch every railing and surface they come in contact with, but we all know that doesn't happen. I  carried 2 epi-pens (and Benadryl) with me at all times and The Princess's daddy carried a 3rd epi-pen (just in case), but we never had to bring them out. 

This is really beginning to sound like an endorsement of Disney theme parks, which it is not. Just my honest opinion about them. It can be hard to travel with a food allergic child, because there are so many unknowns and what-ifs and some people and places are unwilling to work around food allergies and special dietary requests.  I simply want to alleviate some concerns for those who might be considering a vacation to a Disney theme park. 

In light of my last post, it is never too late to make some memories with our families and loved ones (whether they are at a Disney park or somewhere else).

She is a real Princess now

Jana

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Favoritism, Smothering and other Food Allergy Thoughts

I need to start this post with an apology for dropping the ball last week. You may have noticed that Tuesday's post was a day late and Friday's post never happened. I do have a very good reason, not just that I was a slacker. We were out of town, in a hotel with no internet access (yes, such places do still exist. Much to our annoyance when we realized our mistake). I was able to post Tuesday's finished post using my sis-in-laws phone while waiting in line for a ride (does that give you a hint as to where we went?) but Friday's unfinished post was a different story. I had no access to finish it and therefore, it didn't get finished or posted. So, now that we are back home and I am back on the ball, we can get back on track.

I have been thinking about the topic of this post for awhile now. I never quite knew how to write about it... and I didn't know whether I was the only one that felt this way or if it was a common theme among food allergy parents. When I talked to a friend of mine (whose daughter has peanut and egg allergies) and shared my thoughts, she completely understood where I was coming from. I knew that I needed to find a voice for my thoughts and write a post about this.

Having kids can be downright scary. There are so many things that could happen to them, sometimes it is terrifying trying to keep them safe. I've always realized that my kids could be here today, and than gone tomorrow. Accidents happen all the time... we see it every night on the news. No matter how hard  we try (talking about parents here) it is impossible to ensure our kids safety at all times. Despite knowing this, I don't spend a lot of time seriously worrying about my boys. They are smart, healthy kids who never seem in imminent danger. Than came The Princess.

When The Princess was diagnosed with food allergies, I felt like her life became somehow more fragile than her brother's. I worry more for her... often having nightmares where she eats a peanut (or some food with a peanut or PB) and experiences anaphylaxis. I want to keep her with me all the time and have a hard time leaving her with people. The only people I truly feel comfortable leaving her with are those who also have kids with food allergies. Only they really, truly understand the difference between "regular" kids and "food allergic" kids.

I struggle with finding a balance between constantly wanting to have The Princess with me and smothering her to keep her safe and letting her be independent. I don't want her to grow up being clingy and afraid of the world. But I also want her here - with us.

I am not a touchy-feely person by nature and have never been one to spend all day snuggling with my kids. Brother #1 feels the same and hates snuggling. Brother #2 LOVES to snuggle, but prefers to get his snuggles with Daddy. Than, we have The Princess. She is somewhere in between her brothers. She likes to snuggle when she feels like it, but HATES to be touched when she isn't in the mood (like when Brother #2 is following her around the house trying to sneak in a hug or kiss and she is screaming at him to stop!). Yet, I have found that I can't get enough snuggles from her. There are times when I just want to hold her forever... knowing there is always that chance (however slim it is) that it may be my last hug with her.

I feel like she gets away with more than her brothers do - even gets more attention. Which, could be in part because she is the only girl and also the youngest, but I feel there is more to it than that.   I guess our family dynamics are lucky for me, because her brothers never question my motives or get upset that they are getting the raw end of the deal.  I'm sure in other families, where the dynamics are different, it may cause friction and hurt feelings. I know what some of you might be thinking... "How can she say that she favors one child over another? That is so wrong!" It isn't that I don't love my boys as much as I love The Princess, but there is a special place in my heart for her because the chance of losing her seems more possible. Something as common and simple as a peanut.

I'm sure there are no right or wrong answers as to how to handle these situations. It is a continual balance - an ever-changing dynamic that I'm sure will continue to change as The Princess gets older and I have to learn to let her go, let her take control of her own life.

Jana

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Halloween... fun or scary?

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!

The Princess is so excited for Halloween this year. She is old enough to "get it" and has been wearing her costume almost every day for the past week or so in anticipation. She also realizes that with Halloween comes candy - which can be a little tricky (and scary) with a peanut allergy. This is the first year we have really had to worry about it since she wasn't old enough to care in years past. I talked to a few different friends whose kids also have peanut allergies about what they do when it comes to trick-or-treating. I was very interested in the variety of responses.

So, what is our plan of attack? I will be taking The Princess trick-or-treating to a few houses in the neighborhood, than we will look through her candy bag and decide if any of it can 1.) be kept and 2.) be eaten by The Princess. Luckily, all the candy we bought to hand out is peanut (and egg) free. If worse comes to worse, we can sneakily switch out the candy in her bag with the "safe" candy from our trick-or-treating bowl.

When Brother #1 and Brother #2 come home from their rounds of trick-or-treating, we also have to go through their candy bags. Anything containing peanuts or PB is immediately confiscated. Last year, we hid it all in a high cupboard and my husband and I would sneak it out at night and eat it over the sink. We are so mean, we wouldn't even let the Brother's eat it. The trouble we have to go through now just to eat a Reese's PB cup!  Anything that "may contain peanuts" or "is processed in a facility with peanuts" is put out of The Princess's reach. Brother #1 and Brother #2 are allowed to take it to school or eat it when The Princess is down for her nap.

This year, since we are trying to be healthier, we will be letting the kids pick a handful of their favorite treats (without peanuts)  and the rest we will "sell" to a local dentist who pays cash for candy. Brother #1 and Brother #2 sometimes complain about not being able to eat the candy containing peanuts and PB. "Selling" it is a great way to get rid of it while still letting The Brother's get some benefit (money).

Since we are still relatively new in dealing with food allergies at holiday times, I would love to hear any feedback with how you handle the holidays.

And in the meantime, I hope you have a safe Halloween!

Jana

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School Safety

With the diagnosis of food allergies, there comes a host of other concerns. Many of these secondary concerns deal with school. There are places that people with food allergies just avoid so as not to put themselves in danger. Obviously, school is not one of those places. Sending a food allergic child to school can be down-right scary! Especially when the child is young and is still learning about their food allergies and how to manage them on their own. 

While checking out food allergy blogs today... I came across this on The Food Allergy Mama's website. This is just a clip - click here for the entire article. 

"I’ve said it before but it’s worth mentioning again; classrooms ARE NOT secondary lunchrooms. They are a child’s safe haven, a place to learn and socialize in an inclusive, positive environment. I’ve never advocated for food bans, especially in school lunchrooms. My son also has a severe dairy allergy, and I would never expect any school to ban milk, or cheese from children’s lunches. John knows it is HIS responsibility in the lunchroom to eat at a peanut free table and to wash his hands and not share food. However, the gray area lies within the classroom. Schools should consider more food free celebrations, and snacks in the classrooms should be free of potentially deadly allergens. To the reader who posted the comment above, and to any other mom or dad who is annoyed at possibly having to buy certain snacks for the classroom only, I would hope they could try for just a moment to consider the food allergic child, and that no granola bar or cupcake is worth losing a child over. Ever.

When I read the above blog comment, it saddened me that we can’t all just come together and put these children’s lives first, and think about what’s best for them, not what’s best and more convenient for parents. We need to think more logically and compassionately about the issue of food allergies in schools. I respect and value the opinions of non FA parents who wish to fight these types of changes in schools, but I hope that they can respect our food allergic children’s lives and well-being too. Change isn’t easy, but it is possible to do with everyone’s support from the top down, as long as the right information is put out, and more people are educated that food allergies are not a choice or a dietary fad."

Reading this article reminded me of a conversation I heard while at a PTA function. Two mothers were discussing their frustration and inconvenience at having to accommodate a child with Celiacs during the end of the year pizza party for that particular grade. They were annoyed at the added cost of having to bring in a gluten-free pizza. They talked about how, if this child (who happened to only be 7), CHOSE to eat this way, they ought to get used to being "special". This child should get used to sitting out of special parties and celebrations because of their "choice" to eat gluten-free. I chose not to make a scene and argue my point as I was so shocked and saddened at the thought of what The Princess (and other kids with food allergies and intolerances) have to face and deal with on a daily basis. I felt sorry for this child, who I'm sure just wanted to celebrate with the rest of their classmates and feel included.

I am with The Food Allergy Mama in that I do not support school-wide bans on peanuts (or other allergens). But I am a firm believer in keeping food out of classrooms (as much as possible). A friend and I took this issue to our school Principal last year and had a very open discussion about why we felt it was important and how food allergic kids could be safer at school.  Even thought The Princess is not in school yet, I would like to have policies and procedures in place BEFORE she starts school to ease the stress on both of us when we get to that point. Although our Principal listened and discussed the issue with us, I didn't feel like many changes would be made. When the new school year started, I was pleasantly surprised to see many of the teachers had opted for "food-free" Birthday celebrations. Even though there are other times when food is brought into the classroom, I felt that this was a step in the right direction.

I was not prepared for the amount of backlash my friend and I would receive when others learned we had spoken to the principal on this issue. I never imagined that this would be so hotly debated and so personal to some people. I feel like I am understanding of others points of view and would ask that others be understanding of why this issue is so important to me. When it comes to the safety of my daughter, I will not back down and will do whatever it takes to keep her safe - especially at school. 

Food in the classroom (and food bans) are a hot topic in many areas of the country as food allergies become more common. While I am grateful that so much progress has been made, there is much work to be done to educate society about food allergies (and other dietary intolerances that aren't 'choice'). I agree with The Food Allergy Mama that change can happen but it will require an open-mind and a willingness to see another perspective. 

Jana

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Healthy Snacks (and road trippin')

This past weekend, we spent approximately 14 hours in our car driving to (and back from) the sunny state of Arizona to visit cousins. It was great to go back to "summer" for the weekend - playing outside, going swimming (even if it was so cold we only lasted a few minutes) and getting away from school and responsibilities.. We were able to relax - despite the fact that there were 8 kids under the age of 10 in the same house - and enjoy time with family. We are very lucky that one of The Princess's cousins also has a peanut allergy so when we visit them, we don't have the added stress of worrying about what she will eat.

Aren't road trips so fun? Well, we all know that when little kids are involved they might not be the best of times in the moment. But when the kiddos are good and you are driving through beautiful and scenic areas, they can be somewhat enjoyable. Of course, I forgot my camera so there aren't any pictures of the fall leaves and red rock we encountered on our drive. We got a few pictures of the cousins, but you know how it is when kids don't want to be in pictures (especially after 3 hours of church). If you look at them all collectively, you can catch a glimpse of everyone looking and smiling.

Part of road trips is, of course, the snacks. Generally, though, they aren't the most healthy. Here are a few snack ideas that are allergy safe, healthy and yummy! All of these snacks are kid friendly (and great for adults too) and are safe for those with peanut allergies. If you have other allergies, make sure to check labels. 

1. Stretch Island Fruit Leather is one of our favorites. They are 100% natural and have no food additives. They have no added sugar - all sugar comes naturally from the fruit. They are made with gluten and lactose - free ingredients. The only problem is... I have to limit The Princess or she would eat 10 in a sitting. I buy them at Costco for about $0.50 a fruit leather.

2. Go Go Squeez Applesauce is another crowd-pleaser. They contain no genetically modified ingredients, are gluten-free and vegan. They also include no added sugar! These can be found at any grocery store.

3. Kids always love crackers and Triscuits are our favorite. They contain only a few simple ingredients that are natural and not created in a lab. We love them paired with string cheese.

4. Popcorn is always a kid pleaser and this version of Homemade Kettle Corn is a hit at our house. This recipe is super, duper easy, can be made very quickly and is healthy!

5. Trail mix is a great choice for road trips because it adds some protein. Because most store bought trail mixes contain peanuts (or the other nuts 'may contain peanuts'), we always avoid them. They generally contain added salts and oils as well. We love to make our own Homemade Trail Mix using raw almonds, raw cashews, raw sunflower seeds, raw pumpkin seeds (when we have them) and some kind of dried fruit.  You can also roast any of the above for a different flavor. For a sweet tooth, try making your own honey roasted almonds or cashews.
*I buy most of my raw nuts separately at Costco because their nuts (walnuts, almonds and pecans) have not come in contact with peanuts. I buy my raw cashews at Good Earth (after checking to make sure their nuts come packaged separately and haven't contacted peanuts). Just avoid anything that makes you feel uncomfortable as everyone's allergies are different. 

6. Obviously whole fruits are always a good choice. The Princess loves grapes, apples and bananas. Other choices that are great are pears, oranges and clementines.

Jana

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